So, how exactly did I get here? By an Awakening. I suppose you could call it a spiritual one. One that is guaranteed to occur if you follow certain steps.
It’s been over three years since my wife of 13 years – we were together a total of 17 – demanded a divorce. Looking back, I cannot blame her. I was deeply unhappy with myself. I was in a downward spiral. Something was wrong with me. I just didn’t know what exactly that “something” was.
Turns out my turbulent, erratic and traumatic childhood affected me more than I wished to admit. At the age of 37 I was forced to deal with my childhood trauma that I tried to suppress for decades. Alcohol no longer helped. Trust me, I tried.
I was so full of self-hatred because of the way I was trying to process
these feelings. Unfortunately, my feelings of self-hatred were transferred
onto my wife. She did nothing but love me with all she had.
So, the divorce that was thrust upon me and slowly began to wake me up. I say slowly because I still tried to drink for another month or so while trying to save my marriage. Which, it turns out, was not exactly the most thought out plan.
Part 2 forthcoming
“While the Dark Night of the Soul is a process of death, the Spiritual Awakening Process is the rebirth.”
Mateo Sol